A purported 34-year-old gay Chicago man claims his longest relationship lasted 6 months, his last boyfriend said, adios, 9 years ago, and lately, immediately after the first date, he lands in the "friend zone".
But things are looking up.
According to the bizarre Craigslist ad, which was erroneously posted in the Missed Connections section, Mr. unlucky-in-love recently received an enticing offer: he has been given the golden opportunity to be some "hot" guy's "ass master"... and just in time for Christmas!
I was offered recently to be someone's ass master. I'm not really sure what that entails or what kind of upkeep that requires. I apparently am not boyfriend material but thank goodness for the ass master offer.
If you're single, and you're into guys with apparent self-esteem issues, email this dude and give him the title he really wants: ex-boyfriend.
The things you'll find on this blog....;)
ReplyDelete"...asked to be someones ass-master, I'm not sure what that ENTRAILS."
ReplyDeleteI slept with a guy once (never again!) and years later, he found out I was in traction after being injured badly.
ReplyDeleteHe expressed a desire to fuck me while I couldn't feed or bathe myself, disgusting fuckers some gay guys are.
It's not just gay guys, I'm certain there are plenty of straight guys who would fuck a woman that is in traction or paralyzed.
ReplyDeleteWhy is this on here?
ReplyDeleteThe Chicago "Standard 4" (questions):
ReplyDelete1. How big is your d**k?
2. Are you a top or bottom?
3. Where are you from?
4. How long have you lived here?
Answers:
1. Did we determine a mutual interest yet?
2. Who said you're even f'able?
3. Not the same place as you.
4. Too long.
Over and over and over and over. Sometimes they even ask your name first. Your bathhouses and tolerance of sex in your alleys doesn't help the cause either.
Chicago gays are gross. I know people from other states that weren't like that when they came here. They learned it here. They feed off of each other (no pun intended).
Why is this on here? In my opinion, it needs to be exposed. That's why that Halsted St. strip gets no respect, hence the ongoing crime.
And as mentioned in the article "self-esteem" issues. I'm no psychologist but that's exactly what I though of people that - frequent - your 24/7/365 Loveshack with no sign other than 3246. Sad. Really sad. I really don't judge that or them, just not MY thing but it's self-esteem issues, no doubt.
ReplyDeleteAnd the guy is 34. You've got gays pushing 50 here that know nothing more either.
You can have fun and, hell, even take it home but they don't know how to do that so that's where I just stay - home. I save my Chicago "entertainment" allowance to save for quarterly trips home where people know how to act like humans.
No different then the rampant crime by blacks here, the "n" word being thrown around, complaining they're being "judged". Act respectable and you will be respected. Same applies to the gays - to everyone.
Hopefully the ass-master has tiny fists...
ReplyDeleteYou get to steal taxes from me to support having children you can't afford. I'm going to fuck who I want as long as you keep stealing from me and write about it on craigslist.
ReplyDeleteWow...12/15 1:06...you're self-loathing is sad. I'm native Chicagoan, lived in NYC, Boston, Phoenix, now back in Chicago, and your impression of Chicago gays is whacked out. There are classy and trashy gay men in every city...I've seen both in all 4 places, and Chicago does not stand out. Get your head out of your a** (pun intended), and get some therapy.
ReplyDeleteThese antigay comments are quite amusing. I drove a cab for 3 years and the ultimate pigs are heterosexuals. If you don't believe me watch Jerry Springer or Maury. Gay people have blinders on as to how truly awful and decrepit hets are. They are stupid lazy pigs; and also most of them are quite unattractive just like the rest of the population. Hot? Make me laugh fatso.
ReplyDelete